19 January, 2012

Feelin' Like a Failure...

So yesterday was the glucose test... It came back 9 points high, so now they want me to do the lovely 3 hour test. Yesterday I was upset about it, but several people reminded me that sometimes that just happens and it's very possible that the 3 hour will come back normal. So I rallied and felt better about it today. Until I went to my OB appointment, that is.

Apparently, I've gained 12 freakin' pounds since my last appointment. Twelve. I didn't really think about it until I saw the midwife's face. Because I thought for sure it'd been a mistake or that..well, I'm really not sure. But the last time I weighed myself I was, in fact, 12 pounds lighter.

{via}

So then she asks me about my eating and exercise habits. I'm nowhere close to being a "health nut" and I don't work out every day. I also don't eat crap all the time either. Sure, I don't make super healthy meals all the time but I also don't see them as being totally unhealthy either. I do have issues with the sweet stuff, though... And I'm thinking that's where my problem might be.

Anyway... She seemed pretty concerned. I mentioned that it might have something to do with the fact that we were on the mainland for 3 weeks and eating habits are never great when traveling. {I'll even admit to you right now that I ate Chick fil A at least 5 times while we were there.} And do you really think I did any sort of exercising while I was gone? No. We sort of left it at that, but she said that if I gain too much before my next appointment she's going to have me see a nutritionist. And that it could be possible that I have "underlying diabetes issues." CRAP.

So now I basically feel like a failure. I mean, yeah, I did eat a lot while we were gone...but no more than I would have if I wasn't pregnant. I know that the weight will most likely come off once she gets here, but I don't want to be unhealthy either. I really really don't. And I'm pretty sure gaining 12 pounds in one month is not healthy, even if I gained a normal pregnancy amount and some holiday weight.

I just don't know what to do. I know that beating myself up about it isn't really going to help, but I'm upset about it and well... I don't know how to change that. Like I said, I don't sit around the house all day and eat crap. I usually snack on fruit or yogurt. I have decently portioned lunches and I make mostly healthy dinners. We eat out maybe twice a week... I guess the only thing that I can really work on is the exercising. I just don't know what I'm going to do because it's not like I'm going to lose weight - nor do I really want to, for baby's sake. 

So any idea how I keep from gaining much in the next 4 weeks?

19 comments:

Elizabeth said...

I've had pregnancies where I just gain a lot for whatever reason. Last time I gained way more than usual and I didn't eat any differently! I've never had GD either.
One thing to do might be to look up what the GD diet is. I hear so many moms say they gained no more weight once they went on it. It's super healthy for pregnancy also.
BTW-chick fil a rocks and I'd have eaten it way more than 5 times :)

Miranda said...

First of all - EVERY pregnant woman is DIFFERENT!!! If you're healthy AND your sweet girl is healthy - take what everyone says about weight with a grain of salt. I have a friend who gained ONE HUNDRED POUNDS with her pregnancy and for myself I gained a whole whopping 7 pounds my entire pregnancy. Everyone is different! With my pregnancy - I wasn't TRYING to not gain weight.. it just didn't happen. Do not "diet" ... eat healthy.. eat how you normally eat.. and you'll be fine!! You're also carrying a girl - a lot of women usually gain more weight with girls.... You have to factor in water weight, the fluid.. so many things! The weight will FALL OFF after she's born!

# 2 - don't stress over your glucose test. Gestational diabetes is kinda common (it seems so to me anyways) and it's nothing to feel bad about. You've done NOTHING wrong. Sometimes our bodies just can't keep up with making enough insulin and it just needs a little help. I've gone thru GD twice - although it's kinda time consuming.. it's nothing to worry about. YOU ARE NOT A FAILURE! Weight also has NOTHING to do with GD!! Stick thin girls get it as well as normal AND overweight girls. That's something I had to wrap my head around with my pregnancies. I felt like I had done something wrong or wasn't eating right. To be honest, there is nothing you can do to prevent it .. it just happens. PLEASE don't feel bad about that.. only 9 points over isn't bad. You'll probably pass the 3 hour. I failed mine so bad that I had to bypass the 3 hour and go straight to medicine. :-/

Just ENJOY being pregnant! Don't stress over silly things like weight. (my nutritionist drove me CRAZY about my weight and "not eating enough") This is such a special time and it doesn't last forever! Your completely healthy and so is your sweet girl.

I'm no expert, but I've just learned from experience. You can take what I said or leave it - but just know you're not a failure. You're not doing anything wrong. :-)

Ahhh... the joys of pregnancy ;-)

Miranda said...

** You're!!! (grammar fail!)

Emily said...

Don't stress out about the "underlying diabetes issues". I promise diabetes is not a curse ( I have type one and was diagnosed in the 6th grade )and it is totally livable if you do in fact have it. I promise everything will be a-okay! If you have any diabetes ?s feel free to email me, I love talking about it and educating people! ylimedonaldson@gmail.com

wHiT said...

awe hun! You did not fail! :(
-wHiT

Jen said...

You are most definitely not a failure! You are growing a beautiful and healthy baby girl.

Anna said...

You did NOT fail! Sometimes I wonder why health people (i.e. nurses, etc.) says things the way they do! It only succeeds in freaking people out, usually. Don't you worry - once Charlotte is out you will immediately lose some of the weight and as you breastfeed it will really start coming off. The only tip I would have for you is just be aware of what you are eating from here til the end - you already snack healthy and eat pretty well, but just keep double checking yourself. You will be just fine. And don't feel like you have to have a major workout, just take a walk everyday or vacuum or clean - something that gets you moving but not exhausted.

Trust me, you are doing just fine - you LOOK awesome too!

Anna said...

Oh, and my mom had gestational diabetes with Pete, so call her if you have any questions - it completely went away after he was born! :)

Chantal said...

Ugh the midwife used scare tactics on me when I "gained too much weight." First I wasn't gaining enough and then too much! They're so worried over their charts that they forget every woman is different. Some gain no weight, some gain a lot! How much have you gained so far? How much did your mom gain?

Southern Roots and Combat Boots said...

I'm so sorry you failed the diabetes test:( I was worried about that very thing a month ago. And as for the weight, I guess I have a really laid back midwife because I have gained 10 pounds TWICE the last two visits and she hasn't said a thing! This Totals 20 pounds in just 2 months..Ick! I haven't been eating any worse or any more then I have this ENTIRE pregnancy; I was seeing a 2-3 pound gain each month I weighed in. So don't ask me whats different other then, oh I don't know, WE'RE PREGNANT and getting close to the end!!!

I will admit that I could work on my exercise more than I do, but when it comes right down to it, if you feel healthy and that baby girl is healthy, try not to worry so much:) I think you're doing great!

P.S my mother in-law told me over Christmas that she gained 55 pounds with her first and 65 with her second (my husband.) She said the weight just MELTED off after she delivered; was back to her normal weight within 4 months and she didn't do anything special other then love on her babies, walk and breastfeed...We're going to be thin again soon. Hang in there!

heather said...

with my son be was born weighing 9lbs and 10oz(had him at 39 weeks). i passed my test and everything. but now that im pregnant again i talked to my dr about going for 38 weeks to reduce the weight more. well that was a no go. i still go 39 weeks but im on the akins diet. she said if i had another fat baby i would have diabetes later in life and i have to exercise 3 times a week right now to keep the weight off. ive only gained 8 lbs and im 10 weeks. so i guess i will see what she says when i go to the dr, but i know how you feel. i dont eat totally unhealthy either and it sucks that i cant eat what i want while im pregnant...

ROXY said...

You'll be fine... As long as you continue to eat well and walk at least every other day. I was in your shoes in the beginning of my pregnancy. I went overseas on vacation in September, visit my husband's family in early October, PCS to Texas in late October and finally settled into a routine after our household goods came in middle November. Then my sister came out to visit me in early December and of course we ate out everywhere so by the middle of December I gained 20 pounds. My doctors recommended eating better and exercise daily. I've only gained 2 pounds in the past month since my last appointment and my doctor is happy about it. I changed my eating habits by eating cereal and a fruit smoothie for breakfast, snack on fruit cups or crackers, and have a starch, vegetable and meat for lunch and dinner. I also drank V8 juice daily since I don't eat enough vegetable. I also started taking walks every other day with my dog for 20-30 minutes. I hope my example will help you out. Good luck!

Lauren said...

Hey friend. Don't stress. You're NOT a failure. What the lady was trying to say, albeit in a not very friendly, bedside manner-y way, is that you should just be mindful- not stressed or panicked, just mindful. If you already eat plenty of fruits and veggies and healthy portions, then don't change that!

In terms of exercise? Honestly daily walks are my favorite. When C is home in time he goes with me, and it's actually one of the best parts of our day. It gives us a chance to talk, really talk, without dealing with the logistics of life. And it's exercise. Exercise that's been beneficial to our marriage. When he can't come? It's good for me because it gives me time to think and clear my head.

Every woman is different for sure, but doctors do have a reason for being concerned about weight gain in pregnancy- not for vanity purposes, or how long it will take for it to come off later. While I don't think you should panic or feel like a failure at all (although I SO understand how easy it is to feel that way!), I do think you should simply keep what she said in mind and do your best to make small improvements.

No need to do anything drastic, and no need to fret! Just take a deep breath, get out there and walk, or do yoga, whatever you find that helps you clear your brain and feel good about doing something good for yourself and the baby.

You are not a failure. You are not a failure. You are not a failure. I promise.

JG said...

Okay, I haven't been there yet, but I know enough to know that when it comes to mommying, particularly pregnancy, there is always someone ready and willing to tell you you're doing everything wrong. Just trust your instincts. You are beautiful and look fantastic from here and anyone would know you love your baby girl and are going to take care of her. And as you can see from the comments here, you've got a lot of support and are on the right track. Anyone tells you different, screw 'em. ;)

Karen said...

Don't worry about "failing" that test - I know lots of people who were super healthy and had gestational diabetes and some who had it with their second baby and not their first and vice versa. Everyone is different - with all things pregnancy related, so don't let it get you down. Trust what you feel is right :)

Kristen said...

*hugs*

As a nutritionist, it drives me nuts when medical professionals scare people (esp pregnant women!) with vague, unhelpful information like that! Often times, our bodies react differently to foods during pregnancy than they did before. So, yes, you might need to adjust your eating- but scaring you isn't going to help and it doesn't doom you to weeks of eating cardboard. If you want, shoot me an email at kristen@whiteglovesoptional.com and I'll help you look at what you're eating now and little tweaks you can make to boost nutrition and cut things that increase water retention and empty calories.

Anonymous said...

I think it is so important to listen to your doctor! If you like your doctor, and you feel like you have a healthy professional relationship with them, you should trust that they have your best interest at heart! They are not casting judgement, but they are trying to keep you and baby girl healthy! I feel like its easy to listen to everyone's opinions, but you should really stick to those that are professionally trained, as long as you feel like you have a good working relationship with them. Family and friends mean so well when they give advice, but often times it is inaccurate and can even be detrimental to you and the sweet little peanut.

Good luck!

Bonnie said...

I wouldn't worry too much about it yet. Try to go for a walk once a day and try to stay away from the sweet stuff. I know it's hard, but you can do it :) I don't even want to talk about how much I gained between my last two appointments and it's hard for me to stay away from the sweet stuff too. Maybe try replacing the sweet stuff with fruits since those aren't that bad for you? IDK I feel like a total heifer this pregnancy.

Watson Gang said...

I feel for you on the weight gain. Been there, done that. I gained 12 lbs also between two of my visits and my dr had the nerve to say that if I felt sick then just eat a couple of crackers, not the whole sleeve! I wanted to punch him in the face! Needless to say I felt horrible, went to lunch and ate a salad and my hubby ordered me a shake cause he felt bad for me! ha I gained 41 lbs over the whole pregnancy. Like everyone said, we are all different and there are WAY more people that gain more than the 25 total vs the few who gain less than 25. You just stay happy and keep making that beautiful baby!