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07 May, 2013

I Have a Bean

Today we had the, um, pleasure of taking Charlotte to the doctor for a well-baby visit. Yaaaaay. I've pretty much dreaded these visits from day 1, and they've only gotten worse as she's gotten older. 

See, here's the thing: I have a bean.

Little miss Charlotte was born weighing in at a whopping 5 pounds, 5.4 ounces. Oddly enough they had diagnosed me with gestational diabetes, which usually translates as "you're going to have a huge baby." Not so in my case, and part of me truly wonders if it was a misdiagnosis in the first place. Anyways.... She's been tiny from the start.

Even before we left the hospital she was gaining weight. The day after, she had surpassed her birth weight by a few ounces. (Hooray for breastmilk!) 

Somewhere along the way (around 4 months, I think) our pediatrician started to get "fussy" about her weight. Our first pediatrician pushed formula on me, and I all but told her to shove it. The second was much more kind, but still showed obvious concern. I get that it's their job to be concerned if their patient isn't healthy. But she is healthy. 

Come on. Look at that face!

She's always met developmental milestones, although sometimes she does things at her own pace. She's never had any kind of health problem, aside from jaundice at birth and reflux. That's it. And her reflux was never bad enough to keep her from gaining. She always gained something, just never enough for a doctor to be happy.

At first it really, really, really stressed me out. Which, if you're a breastfeeding mama, you know that stress only causes more problems with feeding and the amount of milk they get. The first time it was mentioned, I did everything I could to up my supply. I pumped, I supplemented using our freezer stash, I took fenugreek....you name it. And then when my baby was stressed out from me being stressed out, I said enough. I still took fenugreek, but I stopped freaking out so much. 

More recently, I have come to accept the fact that I have a bean. She will probably always be small. Doctors are going to guilt-trip or give really unhelpful advice, much like I received today. 

"You just need to feed her more. She should probably have 1-2 more snacks a day."

Sure. Because a snack is going to make her gain by leaps and bounds!! Plus, I'd like to know when the heck I'm supposed to fit one of those in during her schedule.... Morning: nurse, breakfast, 1.5 hr of play time, nap. Afternoon: nurse, lunch, 1.5-2 hrs of play time, nap. Evening: nurse (sometimes), snack, play, dinner, nurse, bed. I mean, maybe another snack after lunch? But I feel like that might be pushing it. She eats very well at meal times, and she often eats more than I think a baby her age normally would. *sigh* Just what do you do with that kind of advice?

Clearly we don't feed her or give her anything fattening. *eye roll*
P.S. This is one from our trip to Arkansas!

She eats. She nurses. She snacks. She plays, grows, and develops. I don't know what more they want from her. She's different. Sure, she's in the 0% for her age group. So what? All babies are different and therefore grow and develop differently. 

I mean, really. Does this look like the face of a kid who isn't well-fed?!

If I had any reason to believe she was sick, I would worry. But I don't, so I'm not. And all the worry-wart doctors can kiss it. =P 

Gosh, it feels freeing to finally say that! 

P.S. In case you're wondering, my awesome, 13 month old bean weighs 14 pounds, 6 ounces and will probably be surpassed in weight by her 11 week old cousin in no time flat. But that's ok. =)

20 comments:

Kara said...

She never looks small in pictures, but she does always look happy! She is teeny, but you are her mom and you know her best!

Expat Girl said...

She is so tiny and yet so adorably happy and in such a great routine with sleeping etc that I would probably feel the same way as you about the whole situation. My child on the other hand is in the 99th percentile haha

Chantal said...

She's just little! At least she's easier to carry ;)

Alejandra said...

Gorgeous girl!! Sometimes I think Mommys know much better than doctors when it comes to their own kids. I think I'd flip out if a doctor tried to push formula on me.

Amanda said...

*sigh* can't stand when people insist and don't take the mommy instinct as good. You know your child best.

I have a tiny tot too but thankfully our doctor just laughs and says she is petite and that is that.

Of course when they ask about her eating habits, the answer is she eats like a horse because she does but she just burns it off and keeps going. Plus she has short parents (I'm 5'1 and hubs is 5'7) and not a chance in this world of being anything but short herself. She is 26 months old now and 24 or 25 pounds and 31 inches.

We do a hand held snack during play time. Cut up fruit or cut up cheese and just set on small table in area we are playing so that she can grab a bite and keep going. It helped some.

Lisa C said...

From a purely nutritional standpoint, you could consider introducing more solid foods when you feed her. As a child grows, breastmilk provides fewer calories because they should start eating food. And, just so you know, most doctors don't have a lot of nutritional education. I would suggest going to the registered dietitian on post.

Kaylee said...

She is absolutely adorable! What were her symptoms for reflux, how did you/they decide to start treating her for it?

Heather said...

I know how you feel!!! She is tiny but happy and that is ok! mine is 19 months and 20lbs and has always been in the 10% or less and just dropped below that and her dr is having issue with it now. But I feed her constantly. It will all work out!!!!

Katie said...

When I saw you post her weight on fb yesterday, my jaw dropped! But she's healthy. So, she's a little small... She'll be happy about that when she's 17. Haha. Plus, I remember her daddy being pretty small before he joined the army, so it's in her genes. You can't out-feed that kind of metabolism.

Kodi said...

So, the times when she's nursing that's basically the equivalent of having a cup of milk, not really the fat content of actual food. Thinking about it like that it does seen like some extra snacks would be good. My boys have a snack between breakfast and lunch, a snack between lunch and supper (after nap) and normally a snack after supper before bed. Just a thought. We do healthy snacks only- fruit, veggies, cheese, or granola.

Sven & Trin said...

You're the momma and while its the doctor's job to be concerned, I don't trust 'em. :)
Good for you! Maybe the concern is that she is breastfed? My Little Boy weighed 20# at four months. They were not joking when they said breastfed babies are supposed to look like the michelin man. He was in the +99% for a very long time. But as his mom, I knew that he was healthy so I did what was best for him, just like you're doing for Charlotte. Way to stay strong, you stubborn thing you. :)

Katy said...

Our middle child has always been itty bitty. No gestational diabetes doesn't have to translate to huge babies. I had it with all 3 of my pregnancies and all of our babies weighed under 8lbs at birth. Anywho, our middle child is 3 and as of her last trip to the doctor weighed 28lbs. This is the same kid that I've watched put away 2 pancakes, yogurt, and a cutie at breakfast and still want a snack an hour and half later. Like your bean she had reflux as a baby (but thankfully outgrew it) and has otherwise been healthy, always. Dressing her is challenging because her long legs make her long enough for 3t pants but her waist still fits easily into 24mo. Keep up the good work mama. As long as they're happy and healthy no reason to stress that they're not like all their peers :)

Angie said...

I have a 3 year old who basically lives on whole milk and he's a big boy. I think some kids are just made with small frames and others with larger frames. Trust your mommy instinct!

Jen said...

She is a happy, healthy and beautiful little girl. :)

Amanda said...

She's so durn cute!!! :D The only downside is the shopping, huh? If she's healthy. I don't see why they stress.

P.S. Rob and I want to have y'all over before too long for dinner or something.

Ashley said...

She is absolutely adorable -- and healthy. No worries, mama! I have a friend who's little girl has always been tiny. But so has the mama -- she's just genetically predisposed to be skinny all her life. At a year old she weighed 14 lbs ... the same thing my 2 month old weighed. They were/are both incredibly healthy ... they are just different kids. Believe me ... when she gets older, and eventually a teenager, and is thin, the doctors will LOVE you!!

Jenn said...

I think the growth charts don't take into account the genes passed onto the child. For example My hubby and I are not very tall people. We aren't short but we aren't terribly tall either. I doubt this baby will be tall. The odds clearly are against it. So when they measure my stomach or the baby they mention that the baby is measuring a week or so behind height/length wise. I'm not concerned until they tell me this serious problem. I also wonder if the this baby will be big or small. I was a very tiny baby, hubby was not. Its things like this that I don't feel doctors take into account when looking at these charts.

Jessica Lynn said...

I hate this for you so much. As a new mom who's currently going through this, it just hurts to hear that your child isn't living up to the stupid standards doctors have. My husband and the rest of his family is tall and skinny (like underweight skinny)...I have a strong hunch that's how my daughter will be. I'm proud of you for sticking to your guns about her and her weight. You know what's best!

B @ then there was we said...

My sister was teeny, tiny too and now she's 19 and you'd never know it! My mom always got scolded by the doctors and finally one day said to (an overweight) one: "Well, we're the same height and definitely not the same height--so who's 'off' the chart?" LOL.

Unknown said...

I was a bean... my mom always says a strong wind would have blown me away. Trust your mama gut- as long as she's healthy and happy just roll with it and be glad she's blessed with good genes ;-)