361

It's been 361 days since I lived with my husband. Since we shared a bed, shared a meal, shared lives. For the last 361 days it's been all girl - all me - all the time. 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Not all of those days were bad, but they were very lonely. Despite the friends I made and how I spent my days...I always had to come home to an almost-empty house. Goodness knows what I would have done without my Jasper during this deployment. {Sidenote: go check out my sweet boy at Tails to Tell today! =D}

These 361 days have taught me a lot. Mainly that I'm still the independent girl I was before I met my husband. As co-dependent as I became after we met, I suppose it's good to know. It also taught me that relying on God is the only way I'll ever be able to do anything successfully, especially something as hard as a deployment. Over the last year so many people have asked the same question, if in different ways.

How do you do it? 

I always answer with something along the lines of "I don't know," or "because I have to" or "it's not me - it's God." All of those answers are true, especially the last one. I've had a lot of ups and downs...and a lot of times where - quite honestly - I didn't want to talk to God. Most of those were during the first few months of deployment. And then they came around again when I felt like I had a good handle on things. You know, the whole "I got this" attitude. What's funny - in an ironic way - is that's always when God shows you that you really don't "got this." =)


It's been a long, hard year and I'm so happy that it's finally  over. For at least a little while, I don't have to sleep alone, eat breakfast or dinner alone, I don't have to kill bugs {!!!!!}, I don't have to take out the trash, or do any other of the "man stuff" around the house. Hanging up this sign on Sunday really made it sink in. 

He's coming home. He's really, truly coming home. For the last couple of days I've gone back and forth believing this. It doesn't feel like he's coming home. But he is. And by the time you read this, he'll be home. And for the first time in a year, I don't have to worry about him or wonder when I'll be able to talk to him next. He'll be right beside me or just in the next room. 


I want to laugh. I want to cry. Mostly, though, I just want to thank God for getting us through this and bringing my husband home safely.


P.S. Please excuse my absence for the next few days. Don't worry, I will definitely be posting homecoming photos as soon as I can tear myself away from my hubby.


P.P.S. Thanks to all of you who have been with me during this journey, and have supported and lifted me up when I needed it. Y'all are the best!!!